Today my life feels like it kind of came to a halt.. and it is hard.. and it is painful.. and i am crying but i am trying to keep in mind that each day is a new beginning and although it is not very fun right now, it will get better.. The hardet part for me is that yes I am sad and yes I am hurt and yes I am crying but my bestfriend is not here to hold me while I cry like she usually is.. She is in spirit but not in presence.. and I wish she was, more than anything.

Tomorrow is the beginning of my last day of winter break.. Tuesday starts my senior year, and my last year at Texas State! I got a new roommate and she is awesome, her name is Megan and she is from Wisconsin. but today.. today is still hard.. and im looking forward to tomorrow

im sorry i dont have more to write.. i wish i could put everything i am feeling into words but i cant.. basically its like a hole in the bottom of my stomach that gets bigger everytime i think about it and every time i think about it i cry.. and everytime i cry i get a headache and my face hurts.. so basically i just hurt.. and im sad and hurt…

tomorrow will be a better day..

i love you still

Live

Tonight is my last night in Dallas…

Do you know what I am doing? Eating Ice Cream! for the last time.. I’ve decided that once I get back I am going to change my eating habits drastically! I did a BMI test today and mine is.. 24.4 which is like.5 points away from overweight… so no more icecream, fried foods, or any of the stuff that you can tell is really bad for you (or me) and lots and lots of water, veggies, and fruits!

Today I took Sassy to the vet.. no worms, no ear mites, but she has to take ear mite medicine because she thinks that she has them but that she couldnt see them.. she also has yeast infections in her ears and on her tummy.. 😦 and she started her parvo shots today.. i think she is a little old to be starting but i didnt know she hadnt had her first shot… and the vet said it was fine.. the cool part was that our vets last name is McDaniel.. i thought that was nice 🙂 she goes back in three weeks for shot two. I also got her a new collar (this makes 3 haha) its yellow with a bell so now i know where she is in the dark!

I am off to bed now i have to get up early to pack (cuz i was way too lazy today to pack 😦 ..) sweet dreams!

Tonight I got to talk to my bestfriend from Missouri 🙂 She is one of the best people I know, shes 21 with a 10 month old baby girl and recently engaged to an airforce officer stationed in Germany and about to be deployed to a secret place for 4 months.. he also has a one year old! how cute, she makes me remember that i can do anything because she can do everything with these issues in her life!

My mom left for Austin this morning and tomorrow I register for classes and I have a job shadow at WFAA again 🙂 im very excited!

sorry its so short but im going to bed! ill update in the morning!! xo

 

Laugh!

Sassy made me get up early today! By early I mean around 11 a.m… We got up and.. well did nothing.  We had lunch and dessert and watched TV.  We played outside, and inside, and showered and really that was all we accomplished this morning.

I called my advisor and yet again.. no call back.. he is killing me on this class schedule thing! He only calls me back when i tell him that I wont be available (aka he wont have to talk to me!) stupid.. but tomorrow i will be relentless!

Tonight I made dinner for my brother and my sister.. (if you could call it that) i fixed.. mini corn dogs, mini hamburgers (which i burnt half of) and crispy crowns! (delicious) and i was very proud of myself! I also made an appointment for Sassy to go to the vet! Friday at 2.. i dont think she is excited as I am 🙂

well off to bed for me! and sas!

 

Live

and i have to work my way up from the bottom.. so looking at this list I have planned out a map of how i would ideally like this to work

Graduation

In Order

239. Key West, Florida

214. Wailuku, Hawaii

204. Hilo Hawaii

170. Grand Junction, Colorado

144. Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

137. Palm Springs, California

113. Syracuse, New York

71. Fort Myers, Florida

69. Colorado Springs, Colorado

61. Honolulu, Hawaii

42. West Palm Beach, Florida

34. Colombus, Ohio

17. San Diego, California

11. Houston, Texas!

and of course maybe after that

8. Boston, Massachusetts

6. Dallas/Fort Worth, Texas

3. Chicago, Illinois

1. New York City, New York

 

only time will tell but out of all of the cities.. this is my map 🙂

This is my last week in Arlington and so far it has been a pretty relaxing vacation. Today I did.. well, nothing really.. the new puppy has mastered sleeping in (kind of) someone usually comes and takes her out around 7 am every morning. plays with her for an hr. then brings her back around 8 and we sleep til 12! its pretty great 🙂

Going back to SM will start a new year for me… so far i havent found a New Years Resolution that i like.. but i will stop drinking sodas and eating bad food… when i get back its greens and protein and cardio every day.. i think the hardest part is going to be that Caitlin wont be there anymore.. Carmen too.. mainly Caitlin but its a close call.. haha

this semester is going to be very difficult i think.. i still dont have the classes I need.. my advisor didnt call me back today so im still not in the classes that i need to be in.. but its okay because it will all work out.. hopefully..

anyways i got confirmation today that i am officially inactive in my sorority.. good news 🙂 now i can focus on everything else going on in my life! no word on any of the internship applications yet.. any ideas?

im off to my sisters volleyball practice and then back home haha.. i like not having anything to do but i will be excited to get back to my school life! i think im driving down on Friday, Chris is coming with.. and we’re going to hang out the weekend before school.. he’s resolved to come to San Marcos at least twice a month 🙂 which is exciting!

Live!

Well every day grows closer to the beginning of my second to last semester at school.. and i could not be more excited!! Yesterday I went to WFAA and job shadowed Gloria Campos in her kind of everyday work. It was so much fun watching what it takes to create the news we watch every night at 5/6/10! I got really great advice from Shelly Slater, a younger reporter/anchor at WFAA; she told me that its not glamorous. You do your own make up, your own hair and in the beginning you write and film your own stories. Getting everything set up and ready is hard work.. you sweat and heave the equiptment around and then you have to turn around and get pretty again and film your own stuff. She also warned me that once you start out there are some creepy people out there.. she’s had a stalker before… horrible i think!!

Anyways.. none of my classes are right yet.. well i take that back two out of the five are right.. and only 3 out of the five are registered!! ughh!!! but on the bright side my big found her wedding dress today!!! its goorgeous!!

i have had the worst back pains for the past week! and i dont know how to fix them.. i sit in the massage chair every day and it is not getting much better.. and the worst part is that i have NO idea how it happened! i just want it to go away..

anyways now i am just sitting at home relaxing and waiting for dinner.. steak, shrimp wrapped in bacon and grilled in picante sauce, bacon wrapped jalapenos and potatoes!! 🙂 it will be delicious!

❤ love

We are becoming the best of friends 🙂

Today ive watched documentaries about giant spiders, large squids and big foot sightings and i havent even felt the need to change the channel! i mean we all know that these things arnt real.. or at least they’re not scientifically documented, but scientist are finding new things every week/month/year!

I found my jacket today! at the Dick’s Sporting Goods near chris’ apt! it was very exciting ! and i bought it haha!

after the new year my life gets hectic all over again! this weekend im going to Austin/San Marcos to watch my sister play in the Austin volleyball tournament! which is exciting because i get to see my little! right when i get back i have to go babysit for my aunt, its my four cousins.. 14, 12, 7, and 4! the youngest two are my favorites because there is never a dull moment! a few years ago i lived with them and its a lot of fun to have them around, they’re so sweet! and they’re also great birth control! i dont know how my aunt does it… 4 kids is a lot! but they’re adorable and i am excited! after that school starts.. Jan 20th i believe.. and the following weekend there is a wedding show in sugarland! the 25th is Chris’ birthday! 25 on the 25th! isnt that cute.. i mean manly of course..  I think he may be coming up to SM the following weekend to hang out but im not sure what the plans are 🙂

Anyway back to the History Channel! loove love love!

 

Laugh

So i know ive gotten really bad about updating! i promise it will get better as soon as school starts! christmas was fun! i got a lot of things that i wanted.. a new white northface denali, a gps, perfume (i didnt even know i wanted perfume? but i love it!!) and… giftcards OH! and jewerly! cant leave that off! anyways!

It was a great christmas because not only did i get to spend time with my family, time with chris (and his family!) but i also got to see my big!! she got me the cutest bag! which i used for the first time yesterday when chris, bree, brandon and i all went to Dave and Busters!

Now its down to business! today i ordered my driving record so that i can take it to the court before Jan 22! and they said it takes 5 business days to do.. so good timing i think! then i figured it was time to figure out my school schedule (AGAIN!!!) i forgot to pay so i lost ALL of my classes… and NOW! 2 of my classes only have one opening and @ of them only have 2 openings.. then one has 4 and one has 56 (im not worried about that one!) but one with one and one with two  are classes that I HAVE! to take this semester or i wont graduate next december!!! which is very stressful! so pray for me January 9th at 4pm haha!!

today i have a dermotologist appt. at like 2 and then im going to hang out with bree and brandon at the convention center while jaz is competing! it should be fun!

ill update soon i promise!!

ooh! and i have a wishpot now! get excited!! xo

xoxox

 

Live

I know, I know…  I have not updated in a long long time! Christmas is one of the busiest times of the year for me! After the stress of finals wore off I drove home to Dallas with (I think) a 3.4! which is still!!! .1 away from Deans list! again!! ugh.. but that’s okay it is still good! Somehow my classes for next semester are missing :/which means.. i think? that i have to re register ALL over again and hope to God that I get the classes that I have to take…

My schedule so far has not been very relieving..wednesday I spent the day with my family and the night with chris! he gave me my first christmas present 🙂 a beautiful 1837 Tiffanys ring! i love it!!  Thursday i had my sisters banquet dinner which started at 6 and ended at 10!! PM!! 4 hours.. Friday morning my sister and i got up and drove to San Marcos to watch my best friend walk across the stage 😦 I cant believe she’s really done.. It’s going to be so weird for me not having her in San Marcos.. she’s been there since I transferred in 2007… Ive learned so much from her and taken so much from our experiences together but it wont be the same without her there… Saturday was my 19th Fudge Party… My mom has been throwing these parties since I was 3 years old.. each year we send out invitations to come and do crafts and make fudge.. the parties are relatively famous in Arlington and there are always twice as many people as expected… crafts are always fun for the kids (and for me because i don’t think i will ever outgrow crafts) we always go to Hobby Lobby and pick up a lot of the unpainted Christmas ornaments, and other fun ideas and set up stations around the house 🙂 the fudge recipe is very easy, every child brings a pan, a can and a bag!  and the parties are always fun

1 can of condensed milk

1 package of chocolate chips

1 teaspoon of vanilla

1 teaspoon of salt

heat, stir, melt, add any ingredients that you may desire.. such as nuts! and then pour the mix into a greased brownie pan and put it in the freezer 🙂

after the party i drove to Dallasand relaxed with chris, he surprised me by already having rented movies to watch that night, Kung FuPanda and Stepbrothers.. both very funny! Today is a day for rest, I was served a delicious breakfast (around lunch time!) and watched a really interesting HD show on Rorima, which is like a lost world plataeu in Venezuela.. now I am watching Home Alone and watching my computer die slowly.. my charger is at the house.. of course!

Tomorrow I have court at 11am to prove that I took defensive driving in 2006.. stupid.. but i did and i have the certificate to prove it! so now i just have to go waste my time by showing them they’re wrong 🙂 and Tuesday we drive to Houston for Christmas!! and then my life slows down (hopefully!)

thats it for my update for now.. i am at like 17% battery life left so I will update later 🙂

Happy Holidays 🙂